By anne b.
Hello Ramblers! I hope you guys are having a great week! I am having such a fun week as it is my Spring Break and I have been road tripping around Vermont and skiing. Anyways, if you’ve read Bailey’s blog and listened to the podcast, then you probably noticed the reoccurring theme of friendship. One of the big things we mentioned about friendships is how hard it is to make new friends as young adults, especially after college.
When you graduate college, there is a good chance that your social circle will become smaller because your or some of your friends will move away. Since you’re not going to class or in student clubs anymore, it’s also harder to meet new people. Sure, you can become friends with your coworkers, but sometimes that isn’t always an option. For instance, if there is a big age gap with your coworkers, you probably won’t become best friends with them. So, to help you all make some new friends, here are some tiny bits of wisdom to attract new friends and keep them!
Let Go of Past Friendships
Before you can start attracting new genuine friends, you’ve got to let go of any past friendships that are weighing you down. No, I’m not saying to cut all ties with everyone and become a hermit. I’m just saying to let go of any friendships that bring negativity into your life. Whether that is fake friendships, grudges you’re still holding against friends, etc. Basically, if thinking about someone who is or was a friend makes you angry, sad, disappointed and so on, it is time to move on.
Take a deep breath, give thanks to the universe for whatever lesson having that person in your life taught you, and let go of the negativity. Once the weight of those friendships is off your shoulders, you’ll feel happier and ready to welcome new friends.
Just like self-love is important for finding a significant other, it is equally important when it comes to attracting new friends, and for the same basic reasons. If you don’t treat yourself right and have trouble with loving yourself, then you will most likely attract friends who are like that too or who will see that and take advantage of it. When you work on your self- love, your confidence goes up, you become happier, maybe even less stressed, and then you will attract friends who are also like that. Plus, having friends who are confident in themselves means they are more likely to bring you up rather than down. These kinds of friends will more easily work past their own insecurities so that they won’t want to tear you down and will be happy to help and see you succeed.
This one is pretty self-explanatory, but I think these quotes do a great job of showing the importance of smiling:
“Wear a smile and have friends; wear a scowl and have wrinkles. What do we live for if not to make the world less difficult for each other?” ~ George Eliot
“Smile, it is the key that fits the lock of everybody’s heart.” ~ Anthony J. D’Angelo
“Your smile will give you a positive countenance that will make people feel comfortable around you.” ~ Les Brown
Smiling will make you look kinder and more approachable. People will more likely want to engage in a conversation with you and become friends if you are smiling at them. Let’s be honest, would you want to be friends with someone who’s grimacing as you approach them or while you are talking to them?
Whether or not you end up being friends with someone, just smiling at them can change their day for the better. And that will have a positive ripple effect. Who knows how many people you can touch with just one small action.
Give a Helping Hand
Sometimes, you’ve got to give in order to get. Sometimes, just being useful or helping a person out by holding the door or helping them carry stuff can start a conversation. And then that conversation could lead to a friendship.
If you’re a student, help another student out. If you’re at work, then help your coworkers out or someone else who is in your area of work. Helping others out will allow you to spend more time someone you might not know and could lead to becoming friends with them or meeting more people who could become a true friend. If not, well at least you’ve probably made a connection for your professional life.
Be Positive and Kind
Positivity and kindness are never out of place and they will always make you look more approachable and friendly. Being a positive person will show people that you are happy and keeping a positive outlook on life, no matter how hectic it can get. You are also more likely to attract friends who are optimistic, thoughtful, understanding, helpful, etc., by being positive and kind.
Complimenting people is also a great way to start a conversation. If you compliment someone on their outfit, there’s a chance you’ll start talking about clothes and brands and that could lead to a long conversation. Or you could compliment someone on something they did, like baking a cupcake, and that could also lead to more conversation. No matter if you make a true friend though, it’s always nice to give out compliments, especially meaningful and unique compliments, because it could brighten up someone’s day. I’ve had rough days transformed to good days just because someone complimented me on my clothes, the way I do something, or small things that most people don’t even notice.
Show You Care
Finally, this tip can be for attracting friends as well as keeping your new friends! Showing you care about certain things will attract friends who also care about those things. For instance, showing you care about your health, fitness, and the environment will probably attract friends who also care about those things. Go to events that support or teach more about topics that interest you and you will most likely meet some potential friends!
The best way to keep friends you make or already have is to simply show them you care. Make time for them by going to get food or coffee with them and doing fun activities with them. When they need your help, move your schedule around so you can help them as much as possible. If they call you because something happened, good or bad, then take the time to talk to them or call them back.
Constantly remind your friends how much they mean to you. That could be sending a little text saying that you love them and/or they are amazing. It could be buying them little gifts that made you think of them when you saw the gift. In the end, be grateful for your true friends and make sure that you tell them how grateful you are in your own way because that will be the most meaningful way of all.
Alrighty Ramblers, that is all I have for you on how to attract new friends! I hope you enjoyed these little tricks and that they will help bring some wonderful new people into your lives. Let me know what you guys thought or if you have any other tips.
Remember, these are just some tips. The one thing you should do no matter what when it comes to making new friends is to be yourself! Stay true to yourself and the rest will come.
Have a good weekend and Ramble On!